Christmas

A few Christmas moments from Toulon.

Yes, we stayed in France this year because my big, port-visit trip with Phil fell right after Christmas. I had to chose. Christmas in the US with lots of family and festivities, or a low-key Christmas in France with a once-in-a-lifetime second honeymoon right after. I chose my husband...and the five star hotel.

And we were not at all alone for the holidays. I am so grateful Phil's parents were with us again for the second year in a row. Despite the high, holiday ticket prices, other grand kids to spend Christmas with, and visiting beautiful France during its most un-beautiful season (lots of rain and wind), they willingly came to spend two weeks with us. And the best part...they're staying here with the kids while I'm in Abu Dhabi. So my kids will be spoiled and fussed over while I'm away. Read: I don't feel guilty for leaving.

In the meantime, we've tried to have a couple little adventures before I go...

like taking the bus to a Naval History Museum.

As you can see my children are super intelligent--at least they looked like it, while walking around the museum with the audio guides pressed up to their ears.

I was laughing at little Zachary in his outfit. He looks like he's ready to walk the halls of Harvard.

The next day we did a little morning market shopping in our neighborhood. The kids were able to see Santa and his brass band(?).

Christmas Eve night (having no church service to go to) we had a little birthday party for Jesus. The kids loved it and made "Kids of the King" hats.

Christmas Day passed by nicely even though we were missing our other family so far away...and missing our Daddy here. There were more presents than any two children should ever receive--resulting in the obligatory Christmas-morning-meltdown.

A photo shoot in fancy clothes from Grandma Jan.

One child is always more willing and ready to pose than the other...

I think he's zoned-in on the fruit snack packet Grandma is waving in the air behind me.

And then we ate a lovely Mediterranean-take on Christmas Dinner. Roasted leg of lamb, parsley and butter potatoes, and ratatouille.

The weather was unfortunately (but seasonally) terrible, but we were warm and cozy inside with new toys and Grandparents to play with.

I have so much to be thankful for. My getaway trip is only happening because my kind in-laws were willing to come to stay with the kids. I have two beautiful, healthy kids who make me laugh (and sometimes cry) everyday. And more EVERY-thing than I could ever need. But I'm most grateful that Jesus came into the world to save sinners--like me!

Oh, and I will say it again this year...next year, I will be HOME for Christmas. Are you listening French Navy?

"Lucky"

How do you know when you're on deployment with the French Navy and not the US Navy...(the little things that a wife not being on the ship can wrap her mind around)...

. When you have these under the tables of the bar on board. Lots and lots of kegs.

2. When you have a BAR ON BOARD!!!!!

3. When your flight briefing room has a baguette bag refilled every morning from the baker on board.

4. When your helicopter has a pointy-nose.

5. When your Christmas Eve program started with a cocktail hour and was followed by Mass.

6. When your ship has a "escale famille"---FAMILY PORT VISIT.

#6 is the best on this list for me. Because in two days I'm leaving France and flying to United Arab Emirates to have five full days with my husband. It might be called a "family port visit", but I wasn't fooled. My kids are NOT coming. My suitcase with bathing suits and summer dresses has been packed for over a week. There aren't words to describe how excited and ready I am go and have time alone with him.

If it was the US Navy, if there was such a thing as a "family port visit," he'd undoubtedly have duty or some sort of watch obligation for some of the time. Not so in the French Navy. He will be completely free--completely able to relax with me poolside at our splurge of a hotel. Merry Christmas to me from the French Navy.

I always have a "deployment song". The song on repeat in my car. Seriously, I don't know how many times I've listened to this one. But I'm about to experience the second verse..."And so I'm sailing through the sea, to an island where we'll meet"...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acvIVA9-FMQ

I'm counting on this trip to make the four and half month deployment "worth it". Which brings me to difference number 7--

7. With the French Navy a four and half month deployment is considered long. US deployments are more like six, seven, twelve months separations. I really am "lucky".

Initiation French Navy Wife Night

I was in over my head the moment I accepted the invitation. Dinner with big-whig wives of the ship. I have no idea why or how I was included on the guest list. There were only twelve others. Hummm? Ship of over three thousand? Just twelve for dinner? Why the heck am I here? It was like the inner, inner circle of French Navy Wives.

Back the story up a week ago...Upon accepting the invitation, I was told to bring an appetizer. The host (a new friend) told me, "I'm going to do all the desserts." She also very specifically told me, "Bring something casual. I'm very simple. Nothing too fussy. They'll be about twelve of us." And then she went on to tell me about an experience she had with an American friend during her one year stay in the US. This American woman made an appetizer "with just cream cheese and jelly," she exclaimed. "Something like that," she told me. Ok, I can do that I thought, assuming our definitions of "casual" and "simple" were the same. Super wrong. Super wrong, Sarah.

I stressed more about my outfit than my appetizers. As I walked up the big hill to the fancy house I straightened my scarf and felt pretty confident carrying my large bag with my pyrex casserole dish and big bowl inside. The hostess greeted me at the door and right away gawked at my huge bag. "Are you feeding the world with what's in there?" she demanded right away. "Um no."

Totally confused and already searching for words to explain myself, I turned the corner and was in the living room where super-skinny French women were eating crackers the size of a quarter with some sort of fancy spread on them. I quickly scanned the table and noticed that the only things on the table were bite-sized, fancy, rolled-up things. Tiny tarts filled with strange colors. No plates. Just napkins and dainty fingers picking up doll-food from silver platters, sharing courtesy laughs. And champagne...really expensive champagne.

At this point the hostess was still teasing me for the size of my bag and I felt like all twelve ladies were staring at me. I worked my way quickly to the kitchen out of sight---trying not to burst into tears in front of everyone. Why was I having a meltdown? Ummmm, because I brought meatballs and bean dip to a party where everyone was eating caviar and smoked salmon on tiny spoons.

I can laugh about it now, but last night, man, I was a wreck. It's about way more than the food...it's about ALWAYS being an outsider. Why did this woman tell me it was casual? Why would she tease me in front of everyone? Of course I had NO IDEA what to bring to her house, I'm not French. I've never been to a fancy French Navy Wife thing-y. It took me five, long minutes, two glasses of water (believe me I was searching for something stronger) and several splashes on the cheeks for me to be able to go back in the room and face everyone. I thought long and hard about just running. Leaving everything, grabbing my keys and making a run for it. "That will give them something to talk about," I said to myself. But I didn't. I hid my bag in the coat room. I stumbled all over my words telling my friend, the hostess, that I wasn't bringing out my food. Yes, yes, she insisted. NO! NO! NO! I insisted more.

And that's a lesson learned. It's not a football party. It's not a casual girl night. It's not a filling, satisfying meal. It couldn't be any more stereotypically French, so I don't know why I was so shocked and unprepared. It's five hours of sitting and being served and smiling and pretending to understand a culture* so full of itself.

*In my opinion...French Navy Officer culture is something more particular than just French culture in general. It's... high society/big families/a desire to be "classic-French" on steroids.

I appreciated the invitation...and the evening ended far better than it started. Eighty percent of the women there were kind to me. And if eighty percent of the women are nice to you at an event, that's plenty--in any culture. French-Navy wives or American-Navy wives.